"WHEN DID YOU FIRST DECIDE TO WRITE?"
The decision to become a writer wasn't a decision at all. Writing became a life line after returning home from Afghanistan. Maybe out of boredom or maybe it was a personal responsibility to tell a story of the untold. a story of brave men i was so honored to call my brothers. reality to myself and many alike but only touched in the Hollywood screens to America.
Angry and lost.
Pen to Paper, my new weapon. Performing, my new high. Adrenaline, a high, wiz of a 107 mm rockets will get you stoned, chasing the dragon by facing the past. a wealth of life knowledge gained from death, hate, and eventually love. i felt safe when i was writing. the rage, slightly tamed. the survivors guilt, found more meaning. more direction. all the ugly slowly crawled from the darkness. i was a little less afraid of the dark. Bad habits formed by worse actions; replacing a girlfriend snuggled under my arm for a condition 1 rifle. late nights fighting demons of the disrespected dead. my conscious was the enemy at the gate, awaiting the perfect time to strike. "something in the way" eased the pain, i still remember looking up Kurts Cobains suicide note.
writing unfolded over time. i came home to a cold place. a place where hope doesn't exist.
i was scared.
bUT nothing was more deadly than being alone. without my brothers. without direction, without purpose. bUt SHARING-Performing was a breath of fresh air as i was taking my final breath. it was all i needed to continue to fight. so fight i did. and here i stand.
they say you have to kill a marine before you kill his will to fight. combat tested through history on the battle field. i had to realize just because i was in America didn't mean the war was over...it was just beginning.